Mistruths Misinterpreted and Misunderstood

I understand the concept of deception. That someone may not be forthright about what they're truly doing, intending or thinking for various reasons. Most obviously it may not be looked on favorably by an individual or society as a whole or it may actually be intended to protect someone's feelings. It could even be used to surprise someone with something nice, like a gift or a surprise party.

I'm not saying I've never been dishonest. I think everyone has at some point. I think what I'm puzzled by is the complexity of deception many people go to and also their feeling the need to be deceptive in circumstances that don't seem to warrant it.

I remember being ditched at an amusement park when I was in high school. I drove my friend and myself there and her boyfriend met us there. Instead of just saying "I'm going to leave with him, see you later" while I was in a concession line she said "We're going over to that stand, meet you over there by that bench." So, there I am standing by the bench looking around for them. When I broadened my range of searching I saw them exiting the gate to the parking lot.

More recently, I had someone else tell me they were helping a friend move to my home state of Pennsylvania when in fact they were doing something else entirely. Ok, I get it. You didn't want me to know, but why tell me Pennsylvania? Here I was giving them information on Pennsylvania, like take a jacket even in the summer and a couple places they might like to check out if they get a chance and they weren't even going there.

I just don't understand stuff like that. And what's worse is I really don't have the ability to discern when someone is being dishonest with me unless they slip up or just come out and tell me at some point. I rely almost exclusively on what a person tells me. Most the time I can't even tell if someone is being sarcastic.

I also don't understand when people say things they don't mean out of anger. I generally believe what they say and don't realize they don't really mean it. Like "I hate you!" or "Go away!".  I'm the type that would be heading out the door.

Them: "Where are you going?"
Me: "You told me to leave."
Them: "I didn't really mean it."
Me: "You told me to have a nice life."
Them: "I didn't mean that either, duh!"
Me: "I'm confused."

Any wonder why Aspies limit their social circle?